Last night, Other Half decided to go to bed early. I'd followed her into the bedroom to find something, although once I was there I couldn't remember what it was I was looking for, so instead I stumbled around aimlessly for a few minutes, picking things up and then putting them back down in slightly different positions. This, I now understand, may be construed as annoying when someone is trying to get into a sleep-ready state.
Other Half: You know what you haven't done yet?
Me: What?
Other Half: Played with your otter bath toy.
Me: Oh yeah! That's because I haven't had a bath since we've moved in, only showers. I'll have one tomorrow. Let the fun begin!
Other Half: (looking at me oddly) You can't.
Me: Why not?
Other Half: Because there's no plug.
Me: Isn't there?
Other Half: You know, we have had this conversation twice already since moving in. I know you were listening because you responded and even made jokes about how the previous tenants must have stolen it.
Me: (mystified) Did I?
Other Half: You did.
Me: I honestly don't remember a word of this. Are you sure you didn't dream it?
Other Half: (glaring) It was a real conversation. You were perfectly lucid at the time.
Other Half: You know what you haven't done yet?
Me: What?
Other Half: Played with your otter bath toy.
Me: Oh yeah! That's because I haven't had a bath since we've moved in, only showers. I'll have one tomorrow. Let the fun begin!
Other Half: (looking at me oddly) You can't.
Me: Why not?
Other Half: Because there's no plug.
Me: Isn't there?
Other Half: You know, we have had this conversation twice already since moving in. I know you were listening because you responded and even made jokes about how the previous tenants must have stolen it.
Me: (mystified) Did I?
Other Half: You did.
Me: I honestly don't remember a word of this. Are you sure you didn't dream it?
Other Half: (glaring) It was a real conversation. You were perfectly lucid at the time.
Me: Um...
Other Half: This is so typical! The tiny inside version of you was probably safely tucked inside your brain in a little soundproofed pod, playing Nerdville or reciting Lewis Carroll to yourself or doing something equally bloody geeky, while your zombified carcass talks to me like a normal person! What is WRONG with you? Do you do this all the time?
Me: I....I just don't remember this particular conversation...
Other Half: This is the third time we're having it.
Me: To be fair, we are talking about a plug, which isn't the most exciting thing ever. It certainly won't be going in the Permanent Archives.
Other Half: I don't care!
Me: Fine! Okay? Fine! I'll get the word 'plug' tattooed on my arm, and then I'll remember forever! Who's clever now, huh?
Other Half: (still glaring) ........
Me: (narrowing eyes) ........Touché.
Me: I....I just don't remember this particular conversation...
Other Half: This is the third time we're having it.
Me: To be fair, we are talking about a plug, which isn't the most exciting thing ever. It certainly won't be going in the Permanent Archives.
Other Half: I don't care!
Me: Fine! Okay? Fine! I'll get the word 'plug' tattooed on my arm, and then I'll remember forever! Who's clever now, huh?
Other Half: (still glaring) ........
Me: (narrowing eyes) ........Touché.
In summary, I'm going to buy a plug. At some point. I'll probably be too busy nerdsploding over some geekery to remember. I can't believe I managed to write a whole post about it. I amaze myself sometimes, and not always in a good way.
No comments:
Post a Comment